Among the different hats I wear each day: motherhood, womanhood, parenthood. My self care: choosing empowerment.
Between working full-time, taking care of my daughter, cleaning the house, cooking meals, keeping appointments, and all of the other various daily tasks , I lack time for myself. I have followed the flow of my life for a long time, however, my days are scheduled for me and I feel that sometimes I move about like a programmed robot, attempting to get everything done. My time to dream, create, grow, and rest is continually pushed aside as I try to fit more in (ironically attempting to make more time for the things that I want to do). I am always pushing self-care aside, because I feel that I donít have the time to honor myself. I am finding that I lose control, because I am subject to a schedule that I must follow and become reactionary to all that comes my way, instead of being in a position of empowerment.
Creating balance in our lives is heavily overlooked, yet it is of utmost importance. We need equal time between doing things for others and doing things for ourselves. This is what fills us. This is what leads to a full life. Choosing our experiences creates ownership of our own lives. With as much energy as we put into the things we ďhaveĒ to do, we need equal energy deposited into experiences we create for ourselves.
This summer brought about a necessary awakening for me. At random moments during my nutty schedule, I began asking questions: What do I do for myself? What type of routine can I put in place for me? What is important to fit in, and how do I do it?
Typically, I get off work, pick up my daughter, head home to cook dinner, give my daughter a bath, read her stories, and put her to bed. I am so tired after all of this that I just want to sleep, before I have to wake up and do it all over again. What can I do to maximize my time as a working mom, so that I can regain control of my life?
While I donít have my new approach perfected yet, I am learning that I need to create this time, or I become depleted. For me, it was important to first recognize the extreme importance of this balance. Without giving life to my spirit, it fades and is left to shrivel. Itís absolutely necessary and vital to make time to care for myself. I am now taking inventory of my life. I am pulling out what is not important and keeping the things that are. I choose to move forward with intention and awareness, owning what I do.
I also notice that, really, life never slows down. Life is continuous, and schedules can be so relentless that itís hard to make time for me to center and relax. In short, I am the only one in control of this. It is up to me to schedule time in for myself and validate its importance. The trick is to get smart about my time and be diligent about creating some for me.
As I practice honoring myself, I hope to have a rich foundation that will reap an abundant harvest in the fall, and prepare me for the hibernation of winter.