Wedding vows are truly the only public
declaration that we make on behalf of our most intimate relationship.
These words represent our hopes for the relationship and allow us to
make ourselves accountable for the way in which we have decided to
share our love with another heart.
Conveying this love and devotion via
words can be a daunting task. The idea that we are going to put down
on paper and then utter out-loud our heart's most treasured ideas of
love and partnership brings up a lot of fear for many planning the
I believe there are two key things to
consider when creating vows with loving and lasting intention –
Anything that comes from your heart
can be a vow & There is no wrong way to say I love you
If this is a task you and your
significant other are trying to iron out, or if you are thinking of
renewing your vows sometime in the coming months here are a few
things to help ease the weightiness and profess feelings deep from
Think of 5 words that describe your
partner. This is a free form exercise, so it should be done with
some spontaneity. Don't think too hard, too long, or even about what
the words mean. Just write down the first 5 words that come to mind
when you think of your significant other. The chances are very good
that those 5 words will give you the foundation of what you want to
share with the world about the love and passion you have for the
person you are marrying.
I love this exercise. The simplicity of
free form expression enables us to unleash and share the essential
things that make us love the person we do, while creating the
intention we want to maintain for a lasting relationship.
If you and your significant other
prefer the tradition of ancestral or classic vows, you can still
personalize them, by adding a single line or sentence that signifies
the individuality of your unique relationship . Choose something that
expresses who you are individually within your couple.
I recently attended a wedding where the
vows were traditional, with one exception – they each added an
'everyday I promise to …' sentence. They each gifted a
promise to the other, that they felt would contribute to the success
of their union. The bride and groom did not share their individual
promises until the actual ceremony, which made the promise more
poignant for the couple and also for those of us witnessing the
expression of their devotion and joy for one another. That single
sentence seemed to exemplify the solidity of the bond and their
intentions in a shared life.
Vows with lasting and loving intention
are those that are delivered from the heart with authenticity and
passion for the one that you love. Declare your love, express the
treasured gift that you have found through commitment to another
person with the world. Most of all, let your partner know that they
are giving life to the ideas of a shared dream.